Christmas Day + Saying Goodbye To 2020...

I want to wish everyone who reads this the happiest Christmas. 2020 has been a year like no other
and as it comes to an end, I want to reflect. 

This year has been filled with many ups and downs, goodbyes and tests of my strength. I have lost people, met new people and also felt alone. But while it has been a very difficult year, not just for me, but for so many, I can honestly say it has opened my eyes to many things and it has taught me a lot. The most important being that nothing is ever certain and we should appreciate what we already have and who is around us. From the moment lockdown was announced and I had to stay inside for weeks, I struggled to find any happiness in my life. Every day I would wake up and struggle to even get out of bed as I felt I had nothing to look forward to, so the internal bully in my mind became louder and stronger. I felt I had hit rock bottom as during those months I was the lowest I had been in a while. Whilst my mental health was suffering, I unfortunately was tested positive for coronavirus. I suffer with my asthma so it was a massive worry. It did take a toll on my physical and mental health as it was such a worrying and shocking time but I am so grateful that I am alive. Looking back, I don't know how I picked myself up and how I am writing this today as at the time I didn't have any hope and I just gave up trying to be strong. One day I hope to talk about it in more detail and about what happened but I am not ready yet. All I know is that the person I am today is so different from the one at the beginning of the year. No that doesn't take away the fact that I still get low and yes I still suffer from my mental health problems, but I picked myself up, I went to university and moved into accommodation, and I am becoming stronger every day, and for the first time in my life, I am proud of myself. 

So to each and every one of you reading this, you did your absolute best and although it may not seem it, you have come out so much stronger. When you look back in years to come, you will look at 2020 and you will be proud of what you accomplished as we have all been tested in the most difficult way. We are in this together and we have all had to endure so much pain in this extremely tough and strange year. I send all my love and best wishes, especially to those who are in Tier 4. Hug your loved ones tight around the Christmas tree, cherish every second and make it the most special Christmas yet, you can do it. 

So please, take care of your mind, your heart and I hope you have the most wonderful Christmas, we all deserve happiness after everything that has happened.


With love, 
Aimee





Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Reality of Mental Health

Image
Darlings, When I started this blog I knew one of my goals was to write about mental health in order to help others going through the same thing, because the thought of another person experiencing the feelings I have felt and thinking the most difficult, unbearable thoughts that I have thought for the past three years breaks my heart in a way I can't explain. It's a different heartache I feel when I know someone is struggling and they can't talk because I know exactly how that is and trust me it's draining.  Fine  became part of my dictionary but with the most opposition meaning behind it and it slowly started becoming my routine and the norm to say that, revolutionising it until I mislead people into believing I was okay, and I really wasn't. But why did I say that when I was far from it? Because this society we live in stigmatises mental health so much when the worst place you could be in is inside your own head, so why doesn't it get the coverage it needs...
Read more

My Personal Experience

I was 9 years old when my self esteem started to deteriorate. Even just writing that is upsetting, I was so young yet I was struggling already. The reasoning being that I was diagnosed with scoliosis at this age. If you don't know what scoliosis is, it is a medical condition in which causes a curvature to the spine. At the beginning it was 20 degrees, I didn't suffer with much pain but my paranoia over whether it was visible to others increased along with the percentage of my spine. Back brace for 4 years and yet my spine refused to slow down. Every checkup resulted in a drastic change in the curve and it was beginning to interfere with my breathing. By the time it was 85 degrees, I was 12 and the surgery was pushed forward because it was affecting my heart. 13 years old and I was preparing for a ten hour spine surgery. Could you even imagine the fear I was having? The thoughts such as what if I am paralysed after this? What if it isn't successful? Will I have to quit danc...
Read more

Monday Motivation

Image
♡ Darlings  it’s a fresh week and a chance to leave anything negative that happened behind. this week remember your mental health is far more important than homework you’re stressing about or what your boss is telling you to do. Go outside, breathe, meditate, do whatever your heart desires in order to keep yourself calm for these next 7 days. take some time for yourself and remember you’re only human, you’re allowed to have bad days and it’s okay not to be okay.  Perhaps make a list today consisting of the things you want to achieve by the end of this week, so when it comes Sunday you can look back and reflect on it. or even write down positive things you done this week, there’s no such thing as right or wrong or too little. The world is meant to be explored so go out and find something new, discover a different path and always keep following your dreams. Love what you have today and be grateful for it. Remember that you are special, blessed and have a purpose. You ar...
Read more